Who Wins A Fight Between Trump And Kim Jong- Un? Time for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind?

Email the Funbag. Today, we’re talking baseball, football, nut butters, and more. Your letters: Bloodshark: If Donald Trump and Kim Jong- Un had a boxing match, which one dies of a heart attack first? Kim is just 3. 3 years old. I know Trump has a good six- or seven- inch height advantage on Kim, but come on. Trump is 7. 1 and subsists on a diet of dumpster grease and fried animal skin. I watched Trump during the debates.

Standing for any lengthy period of time is a real struggle for him. That’s why, when he gives speeches, he grabs the podium like it’s a walker. Kim is taking him out.

• The history of baseball in the United States can be traced to the 19th century, when amateurs played a baseball-like game by their own informal rules using homemade.
• Sports journalists and bloggers covering NFL, MLB, NBA, NHL, MMA, college football and basketball, NASCAR, fantasy sports and more. News, photos, mock drafts, game.
• Five Things to Watch on Netflix in June 2017. From the return of OITNB to your next Big Little Lies.
• I Made Bogey is an online golf apparel company that sells products with slogans you’d expect to see on the Wildwood boardwalk. There are a series of t-shirts.
• The Contentious Physics of Wiffle Ball. An engineer sheds light on the ball’s much-debated curve. An Object Lesson.

I don’t care if Trump supposedly knocked Don Jr. Don Jr. is soft. It takes minimal dad strength to put him down. I’m going with Kim in a 3- round TKO.

Summer brings with it warm weather, free time, and a whole lotta shows to watch on Netflix. But with these new additions—like Orange Is the New Black (Season 5. Every time you go to the park, it goes, you have a chance to see something you've never seen before. But I've seen a lot of baseball. I figure I've seen around 4,000. · It's getting harder and harder to keep up with all the new series and films coming to streaming platforms such as Netflix, Amazon and Hulu, and June is no.

By the way, I would pay real money to see this fight. At least three bucks. And I’d pay even MORE for the weigh- in. Oh hey, you want another unverified Trump rumor? Here it is: Trump once pissed off American avocado farmers (BIG CADO!) because he promised a foreign head of state that he would buy their avocados (whether or not a president can just up and buy a bunch of avocados from another country is debatable). Anyway, what allegedly closed the deal for Trump was something like the following exchange: TRUMP: Are your avocados better than the Hass avocados?

HEAD OF STATE: Yes. TRUMP: Can you make guacamole with these avocados? HEAD OF STATE: Yes. That was all it took. Deal done. No one tell Trump that you can make salsa from tomatoes. His mind would be blown.

Joe: Would you enjoy baseball more if it were three innings of baseball with nine- out half- innings as opposed to the current iteration? I feel like the game would go by faster and there would be more offense. Boom! Why aren’t I the commissioner? No. No way. You don’t want a half- inning to last an hour. Pitchers would die.

Small children would pass out from exhaustion in the stands. Ever sit through a long half- inning, with six pitching changes and 1.

It’s torture for any neutral observer. And for the pitching team, it feels like you’ve been condemned to hell and that the half- inning will literally never end. The longer any inning goes, the harder it gets to secure an out. So if you have to get NINE outs just to get to your turn at bat, the psychological toll on everyone involved would be disastrous. They’d have to sprinkle stadium pretzels with powdered Xanax.

Besides, baseball and football both benefit from downtime. They are sports designed for the American attention span. I’m the kind of shithead who cherishes the opportunity to tweet about a cool play rather than watching the cool play itself.

It’s basically an illness at this point. So no, I don’t want baseball being reformatted into inning megablocks.

Keep it nice and choppy so that I always have an excuse to get up for beer. Jeff: What is the hardest semi- regular word to type correctly? I seem to always struggle with “balloon”. For some reason my finger never wants to type that second “o” and I end up with “ballon”. I have very hard time with any word that has three vowels in a row and/or multiple vowel pairings: lieutenant, connoisseur, beautiful, etc. Fuck these words. They are not efficient words.

If you need three vowels to get the sound across, the word is flawed. YOU HEAR ME, FRANCE?

The next time a French person uses a hard consonant will be the first. Drooling is not a language, Pierre!

Also, if you’re typing on a phone, the A will fuck you good. I have … let’s say generous- sized fingertips. That means I’m constantly hitting the SHIFT key instead of the A by accident and ending up spelling shit like “f. Rt,” and “b. Lls.” Annoying. It’s probably not good for my health that an i.

Phone keypad and autocorrect can team up to give me a conniption at least five times a day. Ryan: Which item is most likely to be made out of necessity (too much of an item, ingredient spoilage, etc.)? Personally, I have only ever made banana bread after extra bananas started to go bad. Probably anything to do with leftover bread: French toast, bread crumbs, croutons, etc. You buy a fresh baguette and it takes exactly 1. So I like to cut it up into cubes (so much work), then toss it in a pan with a shitload of butter, olive oil, salt, and parmesan. Watch A Guy Thing Dailymotion more. PRESTO, you got yourself a shitload of croutons.

In theory, these could last a week. In reality, I eat half of them right there at the kitchen counter. Some of the greatest foods in human history were birthed from similar necessity. People smoked and spiced extra meat to keep it from spoiling.

All good soups come from old bones and table scraps. You can even make bread soup, and it’s good.

One time I made Cocoa Puff treats (like Rice Krispies treats) out of stale Cocoa Puffs, and they were awesome. No one else in the house touched them, but that’s because they’re ignorant. I finished the whole pan to prove a point, dammit. I am always looking for ways to repurpose leftovers into something that isn’t leftovers. Like fried rice. You can pretty much make fried rice out of any shit you got lying around: old chicken, boring vegetables, human remains, ALL OF IT. Or a frittata! A frittata is just an omelet with future garbage in it. Read Kitchen Confidential and you know that Sunday Brunch is basically cleaning day at your local trattoria.

Transforming leftovers is the hallmark of a TRUE CHEF. Anon: Recently, I was at a small music venue near my house and ran into my ex- girlfriend from college. For some background we broke up over eight years ago right after we graduated and haven’t really been in contact since. Maybe seen each other twice in that time span and not for 4- 5 years. She lives in a different state and we are not involved in each other’s lives at this point.

After the initial shock of seeing her wore off, we said hellos and chatted for a few minutes and I was ready to move on. I was at the venue with my current girlfriend and not really interested in hanging out with ex. The ex was upset with what she perceived as a “brush- off” by me and expected to hang out with us/me longer. My question is should I feel obligated to hang out with her at the venue? If it makes a difference she dumped me way back when. That’s ridiculous.

What are you gonna do, hang out the whole night? With your current girlfriend right there? Fuck that. I say it’s rude for your ex to even show up! She should have to leave the venue. I’m all for amicable splits, but if you haven’t spoken in ages, you’re not obligated to stand there and spark up some revitalized, platonic version of your previous relationship.

You’re not a bad person if you just want to cut it off entirely, forever. That’s your choice as a free citizen. And if that miffs her, who gives a shit?

What’s she gonna do, continue to no longer have sex with you? You’re not boyfriend and girlfriend anymore.

You’re not anything. That’s always a nice feeling, when you’ve achieved genuine closure on an old relationship and you can pull the power move of being like, “I have no obligation to you of any kind anymore.” It’s empowering. The entire Kelly Clarkson discography is based on that moment. Savor it, baby. Next time your ex steps to you at a concert, blow smoke in her face and say, “Didn’t you hear the news? IT’S OVER, HONEY.” That’s the classy move. Kevin: Is Nutella good? Of course it is. It’s so good that Nutella has so far been undamaged by BIG NUT BUTTER’s attempts to eat into its market share.